Practice Makes…A Life

Warning:  This is a personal post.  If you don’t want to read about what a real life looks and feels like, then just skip this post.  Go straight to the business posts.  This particular post is for all the readers who struggle with…anything.

I don’t know about you, but sometimes I find myself just kind of “in a funk”.  Leaving the house in a rush and escaping to a restaurant to read and write and work because I don’t want to say a truthful thing to a house guest who hurt my feelings.

I fall into the same pattern of behaviors that have ill-served me over the years.  Apparently I’m pretty good at persuasive communication and not-so-hot at honest, vulnerable communication.  So instead of saying, “Wow, that behavior of yours hurt me,” I grab my computer, books and rush out the door to drop the kids at school and escape the uncomfortable feelings bubbling up inside me.

I am obviously bothered by these feelings because I woke up this morning at 2:17am just in time to watch the Amtrack train cross the trestle heading south.  And when I couldn’t go back to sleep by 3:30, I slipped to the kitchen for my cure-all, Advil, and went back to bed deeply breathing my mantra “God made me enough” over and over again.

And these feelings rage around inside of me and I can’t figure out how to say it nicely.  And then I read the blog posts of my most current wonder-woman Crystal Paine and think how little I”m producing and how slow my progress and all the other not-enough lies that come from comparison and I wonder if any of my dear readers ever feel this same way?

Do you have an agenda list 2 miles long and somehow just can’t seem to get accomplished what you want to get accomplished?  Do you have things to say and instead of being Brave (Brene Brown) or a Warrior (Glenna Melton) you suck it back inside and smolder?  I’m sorry if you do this.  I’m sorry I do this.  I want to be the woman who bravely speaks and lives her truth.

You might even look at me and think, “Christy is a clear communicator,” “She speaks the truth in love,” but then you would be looking at my outside and not my stress-induced rash or my marriage that’s in a hard spot or my sadness with some of my most personal relationships.

My dear sisters.  We are on a journey and I want to encourage you on yours while I encourage myself on mine.  I will write this post and maybe post it, and then I will create my own list of 3 4 things I will do to pull myself out of this pit and get busy doing what I was put on earth to do.

1. Remember that your mission is uniquely your own.  The journey you are on only you can travel. You are the right person for the right job.  Claim your mission with thankfulness. Here’s mine.  God first cliche, but true – Oh how He loves you and me! My Husband, love him unconditionally.  My children love them without expectations.  My work/health.  Programs to write, people to encourage, miles to run.
2. Revisit your Goals.  What is the most important next step?  See programs to write, above.
3. Get busy doing something of value that will move you towards those goals.  Don’t check Facebook or read over other (better) blogs.  Get busy producing.  I always feel better when I produce.
4. Ignore the other 3 things until you face your fear.  Say the uncomfortable thing you need to say.  (More action!)  Today I will be brave.  I promise you I will figure out the words to say.  I will not try to convince.  I will be honest and vulnerable.  Yuck.  Just thinking about it twists my gut into a knot.  But I will do this today first because I want to grow.  I want to start defaulting into the better choices instead of the old ones that produce negative results.  And I know I have to practice to get better.  Today I will practice.

And so I offer to you these thoughts.  My heart hopes you will not judge me too harshly.  Instead, I hope you find some encouragement in my struggling path for your own path.  Maybe you will even feel better because this is not your struggle.  You got this!  Be thankful, and pass this along to someone in your life who is struggling.  Because maybe she needs to be reminded that she really is the right person for her right job and the world is waiting.

Deuteronomy 31:6  “Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.”

Question:  I’ll leave my results from today in the comments section. I’d love to hear your results too!  Please encourage me by leaving your comments below.