Did you try the 3×5 No? If so, good for you! If not…well, here are 2 more ways to say No, nicely. Maybe one of these will work for you.
2. The Priority No. This is the one you use with your boss. When she comes running to you and asks you to drop what you’re doing and get to work immediately on this newer, higher priority project, here’s what you do. Calmly pull out your list of priorities (discussed with and approved by your boss at the beginning of the current week), and ask her which of these other, prioritized items, she would like you to take off the list so that you can add her new priority project.
This little ploy will remind your boss that you are working off a priority list, and will either cause her to a) go find someone else to do the job – someone who is not working off a priority list, or b) re-think and re-assign the planned-on projects. Either way, you in a good spot because you’re sticking to the projects as planned, and you won’t get penalized later for not finishing your priority list.
The one thing the Priority No requires is…yes, you guessed it…Priorities! Even if you work in an environment where priorities are not discussed – or things are unorganized and randomly worked on, you personally, need priorities. Take this opportunity to review what you are doing and make sure you are on track to reach your goals. In order to reach your goals, my guess is that you’ll need to set priorities. I love this method of saying no because it always pulls me back to what’s really important. Now, I just have to remember to use it! 🙂
3. The Full Plate No. This is the one you use with your friends and co-workers when they want to rope you into another “good cause” for which you really don’t have time. For example, for the past 5 years you have enjoyed organizing the office holiday party. This year, however, you have begun taking night classes and you are too overloaded to organize the party. So, when they ask you about organizing the party again this year, you simply say, “Thank you for asking, however, my plate is really full right now, I’m going to have to pass on organizing the party this year.”
Notice how simple this is! No long list of reasons or excuses, just a simple “no thank you.” It’s a clean and simple get-away, and leaves everyone feeling positive. This Full Plate No leaves you feeling empowered as you draw clear boundaries, and leaves the other person impressed you were able to clearly express your desires.
If saying No is a difficult area for you, I want to recommend a fabulous book by Lysa TerKeurst called The Best Yes: Making Wise Decisions in the Midst of Endless Demands
This is Day 15 of 31 Days of Powerful Communication Skills for Women. You can read all of my #31Days posts here. And check out The Nester’s #Write31Days blog for other great 31 day series.
I hope you’ve enjoyed these techniques to help you say No. I’d love to hear your experience. Please leave your comments below.
This is great, Christy! I personally struggle so much with saying no, and these tips really help! Thanks