Yesterday I talked about how to become a person people want to communicate with because they know you. Today, building on the idea that people communicate most effectively with those they know, like and trust, let’s dive a little deeper into the like and trust segments.
Like – Are you a likable person? What is that intangible that makes you like someone else? I think it’s the magic of interest in others. When you are around someone who is genuinely interested in you, you can’t help liking them. Their focus on you makes you feel good, and when you feel good, you’re more likely to overlook minor irritants and like them back.
When I think of the people I really like, and want to know more, they are invariably people who are actually interested in me. And how do I know that? They ask questions. They listen when I answer them. They remember things about me and what is important to me. How are you doing? When was the last time you became more likable by asking thoughtful, interested questions? Why not start today?
Trust – Are you trustworthy? Do people know they can count on you no matter what? Trust is hard to build and very easy to lose. I know some people are slower to build trust than others, but the hard, cold fact is that nobody will take you seriously unless they can trust you. They need to know you will be ethical and do what you say you will do. Ouch.
My guess is most of us could improve in this area. Circumstances affect our behavior and sometimes we don’t follow-through, or we allow ourselves to move in the shade of gray…hmmm. When others trust you, they have the gold standard to count on – and you have the privilege of being heard authentically when you communicate.
Know, Like, Trust. Three cornerstones for effective communication you can begin working on right now. If you are serious about building positive connections and living a purposeful life, you will want to think about and start putting into practice the skills of being known, likable and trustworthy.
Another excellent resource if you are struggling with this idea, is the book Little Black Book of Connections: 6.5 Assets for Networking Your Way to Rich Relationships
This is Day 23 of 31 Days of Powerful Communication Skills for Women. You can read all of my #31Days posts here. And check out The Nester’s #Write31Days blog for other great 31 day series.
Question: What do the people you know, like and trust have in common? Can you name what element about them allows and encourages you to be in relationship with them? I’d love to hear your stories. Please leave your comments below.
This is such a great 31 day topic, it’s the first one I’ve seen like this. In answer to your question the people I enjoy being around the most are all great listeners and super supportive.